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Coaching Missy (): You Can’t Read THIS Review on Amazon…!

photo credit: Oregon State University

Ellie Saxx, Coaching Missy (No publisher given, no date given)

Points off: no publisher listed, no publication date listed.


photo credit: W. H. Smith

The British cover… I like it better than the American cover.

Coaching Missy, a twenty-one-page Kindle short, starts off not bad, though Saxx does seem to have some continuity problems (the size of Missy’s breasts is described in a couple of different ways that may not actually be contradictory, but certainly feels that way). The sex is hot, if not at all realistic (this is not necessarily a bad thing in Kindle porn), but all the sudden, whoa:

She reached up to grab his shaft and plunged half of his dick straight into her mouth. The taste – salty, with a mix of her pussy juices, Stephen’s pre-cum and sweat, and an indescribable hint of her virgin ass – was intoxicating.

Umm, okay. I’m thinking that depending on your sensitivity to that sort of thing, that’s either going to make you throw up in your mouth a little or send you into fits of hysterics. I can pretty much guarantee that “erotic” is not one of the choices there. (And that’s not taking into consideration the odd stylistic choices and that long-held hallmark of the bad porn writer, the inability to spell the word “come” correctly.) “An indescribable hint of her virgin ass?” I’m still giggling. * ½ 

About Robert "Goat" Beveridge

Media critic (amateur, semi-pro, and for one brief shining moment in 2000 pro) since 1986. Guy behind noise/powerelectronics band XTerminal (after many small stints in jazz, rock, and metal bands). Known for being tactless but honest.

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